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Khamis, 3 November 2011

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Jokes: Computer Blind

Posted: 03 Nov 2011 01:25 AM PDT

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT.

ABBOTT : Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT : Mac?

COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT : Your computer?

COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT : Mac?

COSTELLO : I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT : What about Windows?

COSTELLO : Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT : Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO : I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT : Wallpaper.

COSTELLO : Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT : Software for Windows?

COSTELLO : No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT : Office.

COSTELLO : Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT : I just did.

COSTELLO : You just did what?

ABBOTT : Recommend something.

COSTELLO : You recommended something?

ABBOTT : Yes.

COSTELLO : For my office?

ABBOTT : Yes.

COSTELLO : OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT : Office.

COSTELLO : Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT : I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO : I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT : Word.

COSTELLO : What word?

ABBOTT : Word in Office.

COSTELLO : The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT : The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO : Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT : The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

COSTELLO : I'm going to click your blue 'W' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT : Money.

COSTELLO : That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT : Money.

COSTELLO : I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT : It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO : What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT : Money.

COSTELLO : Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT : Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO : I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT : One copy.

COSTELLO : Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT : Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO : They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT : Why not? THEY OWN IT!

( A few days later )

ABBOTT : Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO : How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT : Click on 'START'....

Kim Kardashian bercerai dengan suaminya selepas 72 hari berkahwin

Posted: 03 Nov 2011 01:24 AM PDT


Perkahwinan dongeng berakhir. Itulah yang berlaku kepada bintang televisyen realiti "Keeping Up With The Kardashians", Kim Kardashian yang telah memfailkan perceraian daripada suaminya, Kris Humphries di Mahkamah Tinggi Los Angeles semalam selepas berkahwin selama 72 hari.

Dipetik daripada E! Online, Kim atau nama sebenarnya Kimberly Noel Kardashian tidak menyatakan alasan sebenar perceraian tersebut berlaku tetapi memberikan kenyataan untuk menjelaskan tindakannya itu.

"Selepas berfikir masak-masak, saya membuat keputusan untuk menamatkan perkahwinan saya.

"Saya berharap semua memahami kerana ia bukanlah satu keputusan yang mudah. Saya meletakkan harapan agar perkahwinan ini akan kekal buat selama-lamanya. Namun sesetengah perkara tidak terjadi seperti yang dirancang. Kami akan kekal sebagai teman dan berharap masing-masing akan berjaya," jelas Kim.

Bintang bola keranjang Kris turut memberikan kenyataan kepada E! News menyatakan rasa kecewanya apabila mengetahui Kim telah memfailkan perceraian.

"Saya cintakan isteri saya dan kecewa apabila mengetahui perkara tersebut. Saya sangat komited dengan perkahwinan ini dan segala yang berlaku. Saya sanggup melakukan apa sahaja supaya perkahwinan ini berjaya," ujar Kris yang masih lagi menyimpan harapan agar perceraian ini tidak berlaku.

Walaupun menghadapi masalah rumah tangga, ia sedikit pun tidak mengganggu tumpuan Kim terhadap kerjayanya. Dia akan ke Australia untuk mempromosi koleksi tas tangan di bawah jenama Kardashian Kollection bersama adiknya, Khloe. Diikuti pula dengan penggambaran filem arahan Tyler Perry, "The Marriage Counselor" yang akan dibuat di Atlanta.

Kim, 31, dan Kris, 26, telah berkahwin dalam satu majlis resepsi mewah pada 20 Ogos 2011 selepas enam bulan bercinta.